Monday, August 3, 2009


August 3, 2009

There is no conversation. Maybe there is, seperate, on your own, or with your friends. I hope so. But here, there is no conversation.

Standing on top of a mountain, it's such a beautiful mountain, shades of green everywhere and the smells, opportunity and promise is so present and real. But standing on top of a mountain alone, there is no conversation.

I know what to do. Tell everyone the truth. Life is really about pain and suffering and being so very hard. We are given the opportunity to dream so that it can be taken away from us. Go ahead and reach so that it can be taken away. Now if that was the conversation...

The subetly and distinctions of what is required to live your life inspired, fulfilled and free are soooooo minor and yet sooooo huge. It's hard to convey unless there is an authentic conversation. I know what to do. Tell everyone to keep faking what you feel to protect others. Keep pursuing your dreams even though you actually don't believe that you can have them. Keep going after what you believe you can't have. Keep protecting others and keep yourself miserable. Keep doing for others in order to distract yourself from you.
Now if that was the conversation I was seeking...

The truth. It is not welcomed. There are truths that are open to interpretation and then there are truths that just are. If we all could believe as we did when we first arrived on this planet that who we are is enough. What a different world it would be? What a difference in our actions, in our words and in our beliefs? What a difference in our conversations? If we could believe as we did when we first arrived on this planet that who we are is enough, what a different world it would be?

I tore down a spider web yesterday and felt sorry for the spider because I knew that it would have to build its home over again. Webs are so beautiful and strong and yet so very delicate. I apologized to the spider. It immediately knowing who and what its purpose here is already, crawled away and immediately began spinning it's web. My apology didn't matter, the fact that it had to build again didn't matter. The truth, that we were placed here to live in abundance and in ease is not welcomed. This conversation, this web I'm so dedicated to building, is not welcomed. There is no conversation. But standing on the mountain seeing and smelling the beauty, knowing what is true will have to sustain me. It'd be easier if I was a spider.

Although there is no coversation here right now, I hope that you are having an authentic conversation with yourself and/or with a friend. Remember if you didn't experience any sort of release(ease, exhilaration, peace) after having the conversation, the authentic conversation hasn't yet been had.

A core conversation resulting in authentic actions over and over and over again. Such a strong and yet such a delicate web.


  1. Greetings Smarra: I found your blog through a Google alert for "authentic conversations" (which I maintain because my husband and I wrote a book by that name, which was released last September.)

    I enjoyed your spider web analogy, and I agree with you that the world needs to let go of fear and engage with others with transparency and authentic conversations. Just wanted you to know I am glad to see another person out their yearning for the same things. Maybe if we keep working at it, we can create a world where truths are welcomed and abundance for the world becomes a given.

    Thanks for shining a light.

    Maren Showkeir

  2. Hello,

    Thank you so much for your comment. I apologize that I am just now seeing it.

    I look forward to reading your book. Congratulations on the 1 year anniversary of its release. This month is the three year anniversary of my blog. It was previously emotional money ( But on this path change and growth seems to be the only constant.

    I am thrilled to know you are out here and spreading the word!